Answering Back – Is It Rude Not to?

When I first started blogging I sort of used a friend’s blog as a guide.  I noticed that, although she never answered any comments posted by her readers, she had lots of followers and it didn’t seem to deter anybody from leaving comments again.  So, I did the same.  Well, sometimes I can’t resist slipping in the odd answer to a comment but normally I don’t.  However, I don’t know whether it  really feels right .  What is the etiquette?

If somebody asks me an actual question, asking for information or something, I do answer or I email them but, apart from that, I remain loftily detached which, believe me, is not my natural state nor is it my intention.  On the one hand, I feel as if I’ve already had my say in the post itself and don’t really have to add anything but, on the other, it sometimes seems rude.

As a reader, I confess that I quite like to be answered and sometimes pop back to the blog to check although I don’t tick the ‘follow up comments’ box as some of the blogs I read are very popular and my email box would be even fuller than it is now.

I read about 10 – 15 blogs on a regular basis and I think there is an equal mixture of  ‘answerers’ and ‘non-answerers’.

So, I’d be really interested to hear why those of you who have blogs decide which one to be and, if you are not a blogger but a reader of blogs, which approach you prefer.

Please leave a comment and I might answer…….or I might not!

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  1. #1 by Jodie on September 26, 2012 - 14:54

    I often answer, but some people make it hard by not being able to be responded to… I wonder if they know they can’t be answered. If it is a question I will do my best to answer. if it is just a little ‘good job’ type comment …what could I say.
    I don’t expect answers to my comments but am often delighted to recieve them..

    • #2 by tialys on September 26, 2012 - 17:10

      One of those would be me I think Jodie!! Actually, it’s not me, I think it is a ‘problem’ between the blogging sites. For instance, if I try to comment on Blogger, it tries to make me use my Google I.D. when I really want to use my WordPress one. I read an interesting post on it recently and, if I can remember where it was(!) I’ll put a link to it.

  2. #3 by jan on September 26, 2012 - 16:12

    Do you mean moi!!!!
    problem is Lynn,I am such a techno dinosaur……but will make an attempt

    • #4 by tialys on September 26, 2012 - 17:10

      Not at all Jan. I don’t usually reply either, in common with quite a few others, but I never feel quite ‘right’ about it and wondered what others thought.

  3. #5 by tialys on September 26, 2012 - 17:19

  4. #6 by Carole Mayne on September 27, 2012 - 20:14

    I have never failed to respond to a written comment, my conscience will not let me!!

    Carole (-:

  5. #7 by tialys on September 27, 2012 - 21:20

    Yes, that’s sort of how I have started to feel which is why I asked the question. But, as Jodie says, there are times when there isn’t really much you can say in response, apart from maybe ‘thank you’ which, with the amount of comments Jodie gets on her blog, would take her all day. I could probably manage to answer everybody though!

  6. #8 by janet on September 28, 2012 - 10:40

    Morning, mrs. I generally try to have a butchers over at the person’s blog and leave a comment there. That would be if I had the time and the inclination though, which I suppose could appear quite rude. I think you have to do whatever you feel comfy with otherwise the whole thing would become a chore and a duty and then it wouldn’t be fun. I imagine that most of us have fairly busy lives, if not all the time, at least some of the time, when blogging has to take a back seat while we get on with it. (That’s me at the moment…) Some of the huge blogs can’t possibly have time to reply to all their comments or they’d be at it morning, noon and night.
    Same with posting, if I don’t feel I have much to say or that it’s not going to be entertaining to read (I can’t rely on my photos to carry a post…) then I leave it. I have to do it with enthusiasm and my writing head on or I can’t do it at all.
    I like blogging and perhaps I’m being selfish, but I like it on my own terms.

  7. #9 by tialys on September 28, 2012 - 14:38

    Hello you. I know what you mean. I’ve been worrying lately as I haven’t been blogging much – not because I haven’t got anything to say but I haven’t had much time to say it. What with Mlle Tialys the elder off to uni and the younger starting at a new college. But, really, who cares? As you say, if it starts to be a chore it’s no longer fun and then what would be the point at all? So, as I sometimes say in my posts, it’s my blog and I can do what I want so if I want to answer a comment I will and, if it’s a rhetorical comment (kind of like a rhetorical question but not a question!) I won’t and hope I don’t offend anybody.x

  8. #10 by wendy on September 29, 2012 - 19:45

    I answer comments because I like the interaction… and I love it when I’ve left a comment somewhere and the blogger has responded – it feels more personal and makes the blogger seem more approachable. (Having said that, I’m quite choosy over where I leave comments, which is why I can go back and check….there really aren’t that many blogs where I want to comment. Erm yes, I am, quite often, a ‘lurker’. )

    But you should do whatever you’re comfortable with. Really. People will still visit and read because it’s what you write about that draws them in the first place.

    On another note…I’ve just got back from a day out in Brighton – and there was your parcel with that lovely vintage bolster cover. It is so pretty and I most definitely can use it. Thank you so much for thinking of me and sending it – it’s truly appreciated. 🙂

  9. #11 by tialys on September 30, 2012 - 11:18

    Hi Wendz. Your blog was one of the ones that made me think more about the ‘to reply or not to reply question’ as I know you always do and it does convey a nice ‘chatty’ atmosphere. I too am sometimes a ‘lurker’ and don’t always leave a comment if I haven’t anything to add.
    You tease me with your day out in Brighton – you know it’s one of my favourite places. I hope you had a lovely plate of fish and chips, a walk on the pier and a good rummage in the shops as I would do if I were there.

    • #12 by wendy on September 30, 2012 - 19:18

      It was utter madness in Brighton – a gorgeous, crisp, sunny day so every man and his dog was out – but we found two new (to us) shops and that’s always a winner in my book! 🙂 And being Saturday there was the market in the North Laines which was great and yes a rummage in the antique-junk shops – but I didn’t find anything special. Still, it was fun to rootle about.

      No fish and chips but we did stop at a pub along the coastal road to home and had a late lunch there…so yes a fab day.

  10. #13 by Houdini on November 4, 2012 - 01:16

    I’m on the fence too Lynne. I sometimes reply to comments – and sometimes I don’t. It does completely depend on what’s being said and whether or not the comment demands a response or not. I would never intentionally ignore someone – as I do believe that if someone takes the time to comment (and believe me – with such few followers, I’m grateful for every one) then it’s only fair to reply. But sometimes, if it’s simply a case of saying ‘thanks’ then it depends on many things if I reply…but I am the same as you, I do then feel guilty if I don’t acknowledge in some way (hence why I sometimes do my ‘thanks all’ post!!) Thanks for making me think about it – and when I do eventually get back to blogging more, I promise to make more of an effort! Hope you’re ok sweet 😉 x

  11. #14 by tialys on November 4, 2012 - 11:09

    Hello Al. I’m fine – like you, I’m not blogging as much at the moment and not feeling guilty about it either. Funny how having a blog can make you feel pressured into posting regularly even if you don’t have that many followers to notice if you do or not! All the best to you & yours.

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